Gay Life
March 9, 2010
13:03
The 2010 Census is underway. Ads have hit the networks urging Americans to return census forms. "We can't move forward," the commercial says, "until you mail it back!"
Last week the Bureau launched an online mapping tool that shows community return and participation rates, allowing neighborhoods to track their progress and see previous return rates. "The future of your community starts with a look at its past," Census Bureau Director Robert M. Groves says.
Well, unfortunately for LGBT people, history will repeat itself since the government will not collect data on gay, lesbian, bi or trans individuals. Even if individuals were able to designate sexuality, online access may limit new methods of outreach.
The Joint Center For Political And Economic Studies publication National Minority Broadband Adoption: Comparative Trends in Adoption, Acceptance and Use suggests that "those who stand the most to gain from the Internet, especially insofar as the Internet is used to break the poverty cycle are not in a position to benefit from it."
Census data is used as a basis for government fund distribution and since more LGBT people live in poverty than previously thought, it is unclear whether the new online tools could effectively measure the LGBT population or assist LGBT people living in poverty.
The good news is: The Bureau will track same-sex couple data. The U.S. Constitution stipulates that every American be counted in the once-a-decade survey. The Census Bureau facilitates what types of data is collected. There are, however, reasons why you won't not be counted.
Here's information you need to know about the 2010 census. You can also help 'queer' the census by joining the QueerTheCensus movement on Twitter and Facebook.
Related:
How Many Gays Are There?
Last week the Bureau launched an online mapping tool that shows community return and participation rates, allowing neighborhoods to track their progress and see previous return rates. "The future of your community starts with a look at its past," Census Bureau Director Robert M. Groves says.
Well, unfortunately for LGBT people, history will repeat itself since the government will not collect data on gay, lesbian, bi or trans individuals. Even if individuals were able to designate sexuality, online access may limit new methods of outreach.
The Joint Center For Political And Economic Studies publication National Minority Broadband Adoption: Comparative Trends in Adoption, Acceptance and Use suggests that "those who stand the most to gain from the Internet, especially insofar as the Internet is used to break the poverty cycle are not in a position to benefit from it."
Census data is used as a basis for government fund distribution and since more LGBT people live in poverty than previously thought, it is unclear whether the new online tools could effectively measure the LGBT population or assist LGBT people living in poverty.
The good news is: The Bureau will track same-sex couple data. The U.S. Constitution stipulates that every American be counted in the once-a-decade survey. The Census Bureau facilitates what types of data is collected. There are, however, reasons why you won't not be counted.
Here's information you need to know about the 2010 census. You can also help 'queer' the census by joining the QueerTheCensus movement on Twitter and Facebook.
Related:
How Many Gays Are There?
Queering the census originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Tuesday, March 9th, 2010 at 17:03:15.
March 7, 2010
08:25
I've always been puzzled by the 1985 Food and Drug Administration lifetime ban on blood donations from men who have sex with men.
I understand the reactionary measures the agency took in the '80s, faced with a misunderstood crisis and a shortage of blood, long a much needed commodity. The miscalculations of government offices like the FDA were trumped only by widespread misdiagnosis in medical offices. Our knowledge of HIV and AIDS was in its infancy. Unfortunately, so was the virus' reach.
Much has changed, however, in the almost thirty years since the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported the first five cases of a "rare form of pneumonia" in gay Los Angeles residents. To date, many paths have been taken, but our final destination to a cure remains unknown.
Less clouded and practically clear are the modes of HIV transmission. Among those: blood exchange, the reason the FDA scrambled in the 1980's to enact new prevention policies. In '85, the FDA instituted a lifelong ban on any man who has had sex with another man (even once, even protected) since 1977. Any gay man born after that date, regardless of sexual behaviors, HIV or relationship status is prohibited from donating blood. The rule remains in effect today.
But, why all gay men? Is the FDA ban on gay blood donors a symptom of antiquated notions of sexuality or a lack of faith in its own screening methods? U.S. blood donations are screened for antibodies to HIV-1/2 and HIV-1 Group O variants. Donations are also screened for the actual sequences of the virus using molecular technologies—far more accurate tests than were available in the '80s.
But little has grown in the FDA's view of HIV/AIDS as a "gay disease." Unclogged is the fact that the FDA ban is not supported by current science, a point emphasized by a recent legislative push to repeal the ban.
Yesterday, Anthony Weiner along with 18 other Senators (including Kirsten Gillibrand and Frank Lautenberg) sent an open letter to the FDA urging a repeal of the gay blood ban: "It is our understanding that there is a window period of up to three weeks following a person's initial exposure to HIV during which infection may be missed by the blood tests. It is this window period that rightfully serves as the scientific basis for a deferral period for prospective donors deemed to be of high-risk for HIV," the letter stated. The letter also identified the discriminatory nature of the policy: "Reflecting the dangers associated with the window period, prospective donors who have engaged in heterosexual sexual activity with a person known to have HIV are deferred for one year. At the same time, male donors who engaged in protected homosexual sexual activity with a monogamous partner 26 years ago are deferred for life. The FDA-imposed lifetime ban for men who have sex with men does not fall in line with the one-year deferral required for high-risk heterosexual behavior." No risk factor should be ignored, especially when it comes to the donation of blood and platelets, but the FDA's inane policy is far out of line with their own scientific methodology. HIV cares little for discrimination and gay men, albeit at high risk, aren't the only flagged population. We're all at risk, whether it's a man with a woman or a man with a male sexual partner. The FDA should understand that unlike prevalent perceptions of the '80's, there exist low-risk gay men who deserve the same opportunity to gift their blood and platelets as their heterosexual counterparts.
Related:
About the Gay Blood Ban
Why Your Sperm Isn't Wanted
A Straight Man Comments on the Gay Blood Ban
I understand the reactionary measures the agency took in the '80s, faced with a misunderstood crisis and a shortage of blood, long a much needed commodity. The miscalculations of government offices like the FDA were trumped only by widespread misdiagnosis in medical offices. Our knowledge of HIV and AIDS was in its infancy. Unfortunately, so was the virus' reach.
Much has changed, however, in the almost thirty years since the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported the first five cases of a "rare form of pneumonia" in gay Los Angeles residents. To date, many paths have been taken, but our final destination to a cure remains unknown.
Less clouded and practically clear are the modes of HIV transmission. Among those: blood exchange, the reason the FDA scrambled in the 1980's to enact new prevention policies. In '85, the FDA instituted a lifelong ban on any man who has had sex with another man (even once, even protected) since 1977. Any gay man born after that date, regardless of sexual behaviors, HIV or relationship status is prohibited from donating blood. The rule remains in effect today.
But, why all gay men? Is the FDA ban on gay blood donors a symptom of antiquated notions of sexuality or a lack of faith in its own screening methods? U.S. blood donations are screened for antibodies to HIV-1/2 and HIV-1 Group O variants. Donations are also screened for the actual sequences of the virus using molecular technologies—far more accurate tests than were available in the '80s.
But little has grown in the FDA's view of HIV/AIDS as a "gay disease." Unclogged is the fact that the FDA ban is not supported by current science, a point emphasized by a recent legislative push to repeal the ban.
Yesterday, Anthony Weiner along with 18 other Senators (including Kirsten Gillibrand and Frank Lautenberg) sent an open letter to the FDA urging a repeal of the gay blood ban: "It is our understanding that there is a window period of up to three weeks following a person's initial exposure to HIV during which infection may be missed by the blood tests. It is this window period that rightfully serves as the scientific basis for a deferral period for prospective donors deemed to be of high-risk for HIV," the letter stated. The letter also identified the discriminatory nature of the policy: "Reflecting the dangers associated with the window period, prospective donors who have engaged in heterosexual sexual activity with a person known to have HIV are deferred for one year. At the same time, male donors who engaged in protected homosexual sexual activity with a monogamous partner 26 years ago are deferred for life. The FDA-imposed lifetime ban for men who have sex with men does not fall in line with the one-year deferral required for high-risk heterosexual behavior." No risk factor should be ignored, especially when it comes to the donation of blood and platelets, but the FDA's inane policy is far out of line with their own scientific methodology. HIV cares little for discrimination and gay men, albeit at high risk, aren't the only flagged population. We're all at risk, whether it's a man with a woman or a man with a male sexual partner. The FDA should understand that unlike prevalent perceptions of the '80's, there exist low-risk gay men who deserve the same opportunity to gift their blood and platelets as their heterosexual counterparts.
Related:
About the Gay Blood Ban
Why Your Sperm Isn't Wanted
A Straight Man Comments on the Gay Blood Ban
End of the gay blood ban? originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Sunday, March 7th, 2010 at 12:25:58.
March 4, 2010
08:47
Sen. Joseph Lieberman (I-Conn.) has introduced the Military Readiness Enhancement Act, legislation that would lift the don't ask, don't tell policy. Senate Democrats have vowed to bring a quick end to the ban on gays in the military and they have the public behind them. A recent Washington Post-ABC News poll shows that 75% of Americans support gays serving openly in the military.
Are you gay, lesbian, bisexual or questioning your sexuality and currently serving in the military? Share your story.
Are you gay, lesbian, bisexual or questioning your sexuality and currently serving in the military? Share your story.
Readers share 'don't ask, don't tell' stories originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Thursday, March 4th, 2010 at 12:47:38.
March 3, 2010
12:07
Dozens of couples lined up outside the Moultrie Courthouse Building on March 3, 2010 to register for marriage licenses on the first day legal same-sex marriages in the District of Columbia.
More: How To Marry in DC
More: How To Marry in DC
Gallery: Couples register for same-sex marriages in D.C. originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Wednesday, March 3rd, 2010 at 16:07:38.
March 2, 2010
09:14
Effective March 3, 2010, same-sex couples may apply for marriage licenses in the District of Columbia. Are you and your partner ready to get married? If so, here's what you need to know before getting married in Washington D.C.
How to get married in Washington D.C. for gay and lesbian couples originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Tuesday, March 2nd, 2010 at 13:14:06.
07:57
The Harlem Renaissance, also known as The New Negro Movement, was a period of intellectual and artistic growth that brought the Black experience into the crust of American culture. Many known African-American queer people were at the center of this cultural revival.
Kathy Belge at About.com's Lesbian Life discusses the gay and lesbian influence on the Harlem Renaissance and the impact the movement has on modern culture. More after the jump.
Kathy Belge at About.com's Lesbian Life discusses the gay and lesbian influence on the Harlem Renaissance and the impact the movement has on modern culture. More after the jump.
The Harlem Renaissance for gays and lesbians originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Tuesday, March 2nd, 2010 at 11:57:05.
March 1, 2010
14:11
Sadness, depression, loneliness. These are common feeling shared by those that attempt suicide and, frankly, not unfamiliar calls from many LGBT people. In fact, LGBT kids are up to 8 times more likely to report having attempted suicide. And, for every completed suicide by a young person, it is estimated that 100 to 200 attempts are made.
Last Friday, Marie Osmond's 18-year-old son Michael Blosil lost his battle. He left a suicide note for a female friend just before jumping from the eight floor of his apartment building. The note reportedly said he was very unhappy and that the woman was his only friend in LA. Blosil is the second public figure to commit suicide in the last month. On February 11th, famed designer Alexander McQueenwas found dead in his London apartment.
Far too many LGBT people continue to suffer in silence, sometimes without words to express their pains. Have we come to accept, if only to the smallest degree, sadness and loneliness as residuals of our gay lives? As if the payment for our openness is the uncertainty of our place in this world. The beauty of the new relationship we develop with ourselves can too easily be thwarted by the lack of closeness elsewhere. But the deal doesn't have to come at such high cost.
If you feel sad, lonely, depressed or are having thoughts of suicide, there's help available at Trevor Project, the Suicide Hotline (1-800-784-2433/ 1-800-273-8255) or Hopeline.
Although we do not offer counseling, the Gay Life forum is a safe space where many gay, bi, and questioning men and supporters have gone to talk through their struggles. Many have found affirmative ways to navigate through their lives.
Resources:
How To Help A Suicidal Friend
Last Friday, Marie Osmond's 18-year-old son Michael Blosil lost his battle. He left a suicide note for a female friend just before jumping from the eight floor of his apartment building. The note reportedly said he was very unhappy and that the woman was his only friend in LA. Blosil is the second public figure to commit suicide in the last month. On February 11th, famed designer Alexander McQueenwas found dead in his London apartment.
Far too many LGBT people continue to suffer in silence, sometimes without words to express their pains. Have we come to accept, if only to the smallest degree, sadness and loneliness as residuals of our gay lives? As if the payment for our openness is the uncertainty of our place in this world. The beauty of the new relationship we develop with ourselves can too easily be thwarted by the lack of closeness elsewhere. But the deal doesn't have to come at such high cost.
If you feel sad, lonely, depressed or are having thoughts of suicide, there's help available at Trevor Project, the Suicide Hotline (1-800-784-2433/ 1-800-273-8255) or Hopeline.
Although we do not offer counseling, the Gay Life forum is a safe space where many gay, bi, and questioning men and supporters have gone to talk through their struggles. Many have found affirmative ways to navigate through their lives.
Resources:
How To Help A Suicidal Friend
Has suicide become the high cost of being gay? originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Monday, March 1st, 2010 at 18:11:23.
February 24, 2010
09:26
I started exploring my sexuality around age 17. I understood my physical attractions for men, but not the emotional bonds or the complexities of sexual relationships. There were no conversations about sex in my home, so I was left to my own devices and explored without guidance.
I understood the basics of safety, such as condom use; but knew little about anything else. I would search for information where I could find it. My home, however, was not an option because, to me, the silence surrounding sex meant it was somehow forbidden or inappropriate. I was confused enough. I didn't need to be reprimanded for exploring my curiosities.
In situations such as these, when a teen begins exploring their sexuality, a mom can open conversations by creating a safe environment where a gay son feel comfortable talking about sex.
I understood the basics of safety, such as condom use; but knew little about anything else. I would search for information where I could find it. My home, however, was not an option because, to me, the silence surrounding sex meant it was somehow forbidden or inappropriate. I was confused enough. I didn't need to be reprimanded for exploring my curiosities.
In situations such as these, when a teen begins exploring their sexuality, a mom can open conversations by creating a safe environment where a gay son feel comfortable talking about sex.
Talking to your gay son about sex originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Wednesday, February 24th, 2010 at 13:26:24.
February 22, 2010
12:33
Not everyone's eager for a nest of their own. Some men are content wearing their gay uncle crown. And understandably so. The gay uncle can indulge in the perks of parenting without the dirty diapers and pubescent pitfalls. Kind of like Coke without the calories or Red Velvet cake sans extra pinch.
Who is the gay uncle?
Brett Berk, author of The Gay Uncle's Guide to Parenting, says the gay uncle is the perfect caretaker. He's "someone who adored kids while they were in his care; who existed outside the mundane and often debilitating day-to-day act of child rearing; who had an external perspective on familial dynamics; and who would be appropriately indulgent and fun without becoming mired in destructive emotions such as paternal disengagement or maternal guilt."
The gay uncle is also the most celebrated gift buyer. Naughty or nice, the gay uncle cares little for how quickly their nieces and nephews completed chores or made curfews. The gay uncle's gift is less a measure of discipline as it is a symbol of the superb taste, bragging rights, and utter spoils.
Gay uncles are also better for a kid's health. There are no Happy Meals or boxed treats for his niece and nephew. The uncle has prepared a special homemade meal, complete with dessert, and post-meal surround sound entertainment.
Need a disciplinarian? The gay uncle won't hide the Xbox, he'll talk out the issue over a game of Halo. Kid having trouble in school? The gay uncle will pull out his yearbooks for a game of "look where they are now." The gay uncle benefits list transcends parental possibilities.
So, "keep your pediatricians and copies of What to Expect close," Brett Berk recommends. "But keep your gay uncles closer.
Who is the gay uncle?
Brett Berk, author of The Gay Uncle's Guide to Parenting, says the gay uncle is the perfect caretaker. He's "someone who adored kids while they were in his care; who existed outside the mundane and often debilitating day-to-day act of child rearing; who had an external perspective on familial dynamics; and who would be appropriately indulgent and fun without becoming mired in destructive emotions such as paternal disengagement or maternal guilt."
The gay uncle is also the most celebrated gift buyer. Naughty or nice, the gay uncle cares little for how quickly their nieces and nephews completed chores or made curfews. The gay uncle's gift is less a measure of discipline as it is a symbol of the superb taste, bragging rights, and utter spoils.
Gay uncles are also better for a kid's health. There are no Happy Meals or boxed treats for his niece and nephew. The uncle has prepared a special homemade meal, complete with dessert, and post-meal surround sound entertainment.
Need a disciplinarian? The gay uncle won't hide the Xbox, he'll talk out the issue over a game of Halo. Kid having trouble in school? The gay uncle will pull out his yearbooks for a game of "look where they are now." The gay uncle benefits list transcends parental possibilities.
So, "keep your pediatricians and copies of What to Expect close," Brett Berk recommends. "But keep your gay uncles closer.
You're in good hands with a gay uncle originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Monday, February 22nd, 2010 at 16:33:32.
09:56
February 21-27 is National Eating Disorders Awareness Week.
How happy are you with your body and how far would you go to achieve a certain image?
According to a 2007 study conducted at the Columbia University's Mailman School of Public Health, more than 15 percent of gay or bisexual men had at some time suffered anorexia, bulimia or binge-eating disorder compared to 5 percent of heterosexual men.
Advertising and media, low self-esteem, peer pressure, and Body Dysmorphic Disorder can all contribute to body dissatisfaction, which can lead to serious medical conditions and extreme weight control behaviors such as anorexia, vomiting, use of diet pills, laxatives, and diuretics as well as binge eating.
Learn how eating disorders affect LGBTQ youth in this recorder webinar from the National Youth Advocacy Coalition.
Also, if you suffer from an eating disorder or BDD or are overly dissatisfied with your body, there is help available at the National Eating Disorders Association helpline.
How happy are you with your body and how far would you go to achieve a certain image?
According to a 2007 study conducted at the Columbia University's Mailman School of Public Health, more than 15 percent of gay or bisexual men had at some time suffered anorexia, bulimia or binge-eating disorder compared to 5 percent of heterosexual men.
Advertising and media, low self-esteem, peer pressure, and Body Dysmorphic Disorder can all contribute to body dissatisfaction, which can lead to serious medical conditions and extreme weight control behaviors such as anorexia, vomiting, use of diet pills, laxatives, and diuretics as well as binge eating.
Learn how eating disorders affect LGBTQ youth in this recorder webinar from the National Youth Advocacy Coalition.
Also, if you suffer from an eating disorder or BDD or are overly dissatisfied with your body, there is help available at the National Eating Disorders Association helpline.
National Eating Disorder Awareness Week originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Monday, February 22nd, 2010 at 13:56:46.
February 18, 2010
11:00
"I am a straight senior citizen, and I love Johnny Weir," Mary Wisler comments. "Men's figure skating can be boring. Johnny with his interesting costumes, out spoken ways and elegant skating style brings some life to the sport. His sex preference is not the viewing audiences business, or anyone elses. Goooo Johnny, and best of luck at the Olympics."
Comment: Johnny Weir brings life to the sport originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Thursday, February 18th, 2010 at 15:00:56.
10:26
"My entire career to date has been a reflection of the three core values of Grinnell [College]: the pursuit of academic excellence, the advancement of a diverse community and the promotion of social justice." —Dr. Raynard S. Kington commenting on his appointment as the 13th president of Grinell College.
More about Dr. Raynard S. Kington after the jump.
More about Dr. Raynard S. Kington after the jump.
Dr. Raynard S. Kington originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Thursday, February 18th, 2010 at 14:26:50.
February 17, 2010
09:36
Gertrude "Ma" Rainey was known as The Mother of the Blues. Although Ma Rainey was not the first Black woman to sing the Blues, she has been credited with its rise in popularity... More about Gertrude "Ma" Rainey at Lesbian Life.
Ma Rainey originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Wednesday, February 17th, 2010 at 13:36:28.
February 16, 2010
12:05
Mona:
My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year and the passion is gone. We have sex/fool around a few times a week, but not only do I want more, it seems like a chore for him. What do I do to figure out where his mind is, and how can I get things back on track? -K
Hi K:
First, lets address sex frequency. According to sexuality expert Cory Silverberg, the majority of men and women who are living together have sex 8 to 12 times per month. You do the math. So, your "few times a week" is already well above average. The issue here isn't the amount of sex you're getting; it's that you've equated his desire for you with the number of times you have sex, which is probably far from the truth... More on curing bed death after the jump.
My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year and the passion is gone. We have sex/fool around a few times a week, but not only do I want more, it seems like a chore for him. What do I do to figure out where his mind is, and how can I get things back on track? -K
Hi K:
First, lets address sex frequency. According to sexuality expert Cory Silverberg, the majority of men and women who are living together have sex 8 to 12 times per month. You do the math. So, your "few times a week" is already well above average. The issue here isn't the amount of sex you're getting; it's that you've equated his desire for you with the number of times you have sex, which is probably far from the truth... More on curing bed death after the jump.
The cure for common bed death originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Tuesday, February 16th, 2010 at 16:05:44.
February 14, 2010
15:55
"Everybody's journey is individual. If you fall in love with a boy, you fall in love with a boy. The fact that many Americans consider it a disease says more about them than it does about homosexuality." -James Baldwin
More about James Baldwin after the jump.
More about James Baldwin after the jump.
James Baldwin originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Sunday, February 14th, 2010 at 19:55:15.
February 11, 2010
08:15
British fashion designer Alexander McQueen was found dead in his apartment this morning of an apparent suicide.
The openly gay designer was known for his sensual and often androgynous womenswear and boisterous personality. His designs were favorites of celebrities such as Rihanna and Lady Gaga. McQueen is remembered for his innovation and youthful perspective. More on Alexander McQueen after the jump.
Resources:
How To Help A Suicidal Friend
LGBT Youth Suicide Statistics
The Trevor Project
The openly gay designer was known for his sensual and often androgynous womenswear and boisterous personality. His designs were favorites of celebrities such as Rihanna and Lady Gaga. McQueen is remembered for his innovation and youthful perspective. More on Alexander McQueen after the jump.
Resources:
How To Help A Suicidal Friend
LGBT Youth Suicide Statistics
The Trevor Project
Remembering Alexander McQueen originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Thursday, February 11th, 2010 at 12:15:15.
February 10, 2010
12:07
CollegePro90 says: "So yeah, with Valentine's Day coming up I was really content with just staying in and doing homework because I am swamped with classes this semester.
Well anyways a couple of days ago Eric, who is in my circle of friends, asked me what I was doing for Valentine's Day. He asked if I would be interested in going out on a date with him.
I am totally taken back by this because he's the type of guy that I would never consider dating. I mean he's attractive and friendly but he's a total player, I mean he constantly brags about his "conquests" and how he has guys begging to call him... So what do I do?"
Well anyways a couple of days ago Eric, who is in my circle of friends, asked me what I was doing for Valentine's Day. He asked if I would be interested in going out on a date with him.
I am totally taken back by this because he's the type of guy that I would never consider dating. I mean he's attractive and friendly but he's a total player, I mean he constantly brags about his "conquests" and how he has guys begging to call him... So what do I do?"
Don't Get Played originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Wednesday, February 10th, 2010 at 16:07:00.
February 9, 2010
09:08
"If I didn't define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other people's fantasies for me and eaten alive." -Audre Lorde
More famous Black lesbians
Image: © K. Kendall via Flikr
More famous Black lesbians
Image: © K. Kendall via Flikr
Audre Lorde originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Tuesday, February 9th, 2010 at 13:08:55.
07:32
In 1981, Justin Fashanu signed with the Nottingham Forrest, becoming the first black UK footballer to gross £1m.
Justin Fashanu originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Tuesday, February 9th, 2010 at 11:32:27.
February 8, 2010
09:35
As the Connecticut State Representative of the 2nd District, Democrat Jason Bartlett is the highest ranking openly gay African-American politician in the United States.
Jason Bartlett originally appeared on About.com Gay Life on Monday, February 8th, 2010 at 13:35:24.
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